A 'Secret' Nook

Well... I should've updated this like a week ago. I meant to complain but I suppose this is all for the good for I do not only have complaints, I also have good reports!

Here goes...

 

Arrived at Singapore, June 15, 2009. I took an early flight (6+ am) and was just thankful that I saw someone I quite know. Actually, I just remembered her face but didn't know her name and had to ask her. She's also an ASEAN scholar... Nica. I don't know her full name though. Oh well. Eunice was there to fetch Nica and because I was determined to catch the train, they ended up not taking a cab so that they could accompany me. I'm just thankful they were okay with that. It was actually very sweet of them. =)

 

When I got back to the dorm, I had quite a lot of letters, the most important of which was my NIE registration. I saw that it's deadline was June5!! Imagine the horror. I quickly read through the details and filled up the necessary forms as well as photocopy the necessary documents needed. Without unpacking my bags, I went out of the room to do the necessary admin stuff including payment for my dorm fees. Apparently, because of my "graduate" status, they couldn't deduct the fees through GIRO.

 

On my way to Office of Academic Services (OAS), I saw Daniyar (my ex-classmate, because we no longer are... hehe) and he was on the way to OAS to pay his bills too! I take it as a blessing from God to provide someone who would accompany me in the midst of all these. Thankfully, NIE still accepted my very late form and that I was able to pay my bills and do the necessary admin stuff.

 

June 16. Went to Raffles Medical Group (Hospital) at Bugis to have medical check up, afterwhich went to Ministry of Education (MOE) in Buona Vista to collect my endorsed PR form.

 

June 17. Went back to OAS to collect the letter that certifies that I have graduated from NTU. Photocopied, scanned and made sure my documents for PR application are all ready. Found out that night that I needed my birth certificate and I don't have a copy with me. Freaked out and called parents and nearly argued with my dad about how to send it over in the shortest and safest way possible. In the end, just left everything to God and decided to just apply without my birth certificate.

 

June 18. Went to Immigration and Check-point Authority (ICA) at Lavander to apply for PR. I wasn't exactly confident but I just prayed that they'll grant me the Temporary Employment Pass (TEP) despite my not having my birth cert and they did. They informed me that I just have to wait for a letter from them whether I would have to come down again and submit to them my birth cert or not. Praise God!!!

 

June 19. In the process, I'm waiting for my mom to have her biopsy done and praying hard that she will be well. ^_^ Met up with friends for lifegroup at night.

 

June 20. It's never ending photocopying, scanning and making sure the requirements are complete only this time, it's for NIE registration.

 

June 21. Sabbath. First Sunday service back. It's good to be back. An opportunity to thank and refocus on God. Awesome.

 

June 22. NIE registration. whew. Found out that my name in their records starts with an M and not a C... They used my surname first. I was scolded (not big time though). Hehe I was more than willing to come tmrw because registration for those whose name starts with M is tmrw morning but they said it's okay. Another favor from God. =) The best thing is: Yesterday, I was telling my friends that I was thinking of buying a new laptop for the next school year. Today, they told us that NIE will loan us a computer (for free... I just have to pay for the ~$40 insurance) until we graduate NIE. Isn't that cool? haha then, my friend also told me that the school that they will post us to (next year) would most probably allow me to have laptop loan as well. Yey! ^_^

 

God is more than faithful and good. He is able!

It took a common cold to make me stay at home (well, in my room) for two full days! Can you imagine that? Two full days!!! The only times I went out was when I had to see the doctor and when I had to get my food because my roommate is out and won't be able to help me buy food. It started Sunday. My throat felt scratchy and in the afternoon, I really felt like I'm going to be sick. Prior to that, I know my immune system is "below average" already and therefore, sickness is inevitable.

 

I came home and checked my temperature, 37.4. I'm still good and rest. When I woke up, I'm feeling lightheaded and checked my temperature once again. I panicked, 38!!! Swallowed a panadol and hoped I'd get better. Monday I woke up with a temperature of 39!!! At first I thought there's something wrong with my thermometer but the seering headache nearly convinced me otherwise. I couldn't move a lot and decided to stay in bed. After lunch, I quickly showered and head to the clinic only to know that my temperature had gone down to 36.8 but running nose and sore throat and coughing had yet to cease. I waited in line for about 1.5 hours only to be diagnosed in about 5 minutes including prescription and the likes. The doctor told me I don't have a flu, just common colds.

 

When I got back to my room, my temperature was back to 38. Wonderful. I slept the rest of the time. Tuesday, I took a rest. I was very tempted to do some work but I know it would be futile and just decided to read some light books and rest more. I guess, the colds was something like a wake up call (for the umpteenth time) to not just take care of my body but really REST. Now, I really should place a reminder on my headboard: TAKE A BREAK. Yeah, I guess that's what I need.

Seriously, I found this funny...

It's anti-calculus! I wonder if that makes you immune to failing calculus... Okay, fine... lame...

From an email sent by one of the staff in school...

I have this certain "rule" for myself that chatting, talking on the phone or sending short messages (sms) to guys should stop by 12midnight. In reality, only very few people know that (and by blogging about it here, only those who read it will know also). Anyway... girls are exception... I can chat with them all day and night as long as I'm awake! hehe Anyway... very few of my guy friends are also aware of that because I don't always let them know. I only tell them when the situation arise and I try to make it a point that I stop chatting with them way before 12mn.

 

I have to admit I used to be very lenient about that justifying that "we're talking about God anyway..." and seemingly harmless things but I know it was not consistent with that "rule". I remember chatting with a guy friend until about 3am before and looking back, I shouldn't have! True, we became good friends after that but I'm sure there's a better way of building friendship other than chatting after midnight. There was also this time when I would go to my senior's room when I was in first year uni to play bridge and I didn't realize that that was also part of the "rule". Although it wasn't like a one-to-one meeting, it could lead to the very thing that I was trying to avoid for having that "rule".

 

So, what was I trying to avoid? Falling in love with the wrong guy or just falling in love when it's not time. I am not so dense and I do have feelings. They get stirred from time to time. One on one conversations (chat, sms or over the phone) could give such a feeling of "exclusiveness and intimacy" that I could otherwise see as "something special". I am not immune to these things and would rather have such a "rule" than have the possibility of ruining my friendship with the person altogether.

 

Prior to typing this post, I was having a conversation with a guy friend. We haven't chatted for a long time and I felt like the conversation has just actually started (after all the preliminaries) but then it was 12mn. I told him... "bro" and even before I reminded him that it's already 12, he noted it already and we said our goodbyes. I am grateful to having such understanding friends. Some might think it's stupid but I sure am glad some accepts me despite it (and the numerous other "rules" I have for myself). Hehe =D

What I really wanted to share here is somehow, a bit... I don't even know what word to use... Anyway... here goes...

 

Early March, after one week of school break (also known as recess), when I arrived at my first lecture for that week, my friend told me that some final year student taking fyp jumped off a building and died. I thought he was joking... and then, I received an sms from my friend informing me abt the same incident. I was shocked... more like shaken and I had to admit I felt like my body is literally shaking... =( For the rest of the lecture, I was blank... just mechanically jotting down notes and all I could really think of that time was to run away and cry... That could happen to any of us!

 

I sent messages to my leaders and asked for prayer. I don't know that guy but he's an international student, on his final year and is taking fyp. That's pretty much like me-- an international final year student taking fyp. Yet, I saw God's hands of protection, love and support that day itself. After the lecture, I visited a family from church and they kindly invited me to stay for dinner. It was quite inevitable that we discuss abt the incident (they know that the student was from my university) but at that time, I seriously needed some people to talk abt it. To kind of comfort me and pray with me. I had to say I feel quite disappointed that there wasn't anyone who actually called me and asked: how are you? after that incident... but thank God for that family that just discussed the whole thing with me. I guess I just needed that.

 

There is now this rumor in school about what fyp really stands for but I shall not mention it here. So, when I met my professor after the incident, he jokingly said, "maybe I should take sharp objects away from you..." (the student was reported to stab the professor before jumping off the building) *eyes roll*

Current Mood: ELATED

 

Haha about an hour ago, I just finished my Final Year Project (FYP) presentation. Hehe I'm pretty much considered a graduate. The only thing that's left is that I pass my other module, Coding Theory and that hopefully, I'll get a decent grade for fyp.

 

FYP. Nearly all graduating students have to do that... I say nearly because in my division (Mathematical Sciences in NTU), taking that is not compulsory. In fact, it isn't really called an fyp... it's called an Honours Project, that lasts for only a semester. We have the choice to either take the honours project or just go for industrial attachment or even just take two extra level 4 modules to replace the honours project. While most of those who opt for honours project are students whose GPA (grade point average) qualifies them for first class honours, I am not. I mean, my grades aren't the first class honours grade. In fact, I missed that grade BIG TIME. Trust me, it's pretty big. In school, if you decided not to take honours project but instead take the other alternatives, even if your gpa qualifies for first class, they will not grant you that because honours project is a requirement for first class honours. Other ranking, it doesn't really matter what you choose as long as your grade qualifies for it. So, if I missed first class honours big time and not taking honours project doesn't make a difference, why did I choose to slave myself with honours project? My answer: I want the best of both worlds...

 

Hehe my scholarship had allowed me to experience what it was like being in school (during the Attachment Programme I attended between 2nd and 3rd year university). Because I have not always been the most brilliant student, I have little opportunity for research project offered by school so since my grade still qualifies for taking the honours project (oh, I forgot to mention that there's a minimum grade requirement to take the honours project... otherwise, the student will have to either take industrial attachment or 2 extra modules). As I was saying, since my grade was qualified, I thought, "Why not just try? After all, it looks like it would be an enriching experience."

 

So, I took the honours project and did I regret it? No. Definitely not. I think I had the most wonderful "fyp" experience. Although I did have some regrets during the whole project because I realize I had been too "unserious" (if there's such a word). I have to admit I've only started being "serious" with Mathematics like last semester. Somehow, throughout the whole project research, etc. I felt like "If I'd been more serious with Math, I guess I would've done some things better..."

 

Oh well... Elaboration on next post... =)

(Re-lived)

 

 

 

 

 

Irene fiddled with the pages of her diary. Her last entry was five years ago, after deciding that she would stop hiding from the real world and face it head on instead. But after the news she received from the hospital, she felt like the girl who wrote the last entry all over again and once again, she poured her heart out as her hands translate her emotions into words.

I watched a friend's dance performance last Sunday after we had the surprise party for wayne and ate ash. The whole performance was like 2 hours but my friend's performance was only about 3minutes out of that.

 

Oh well. So, when he performed (with others, of course), I was really happy to see him dance so well! Haha when I met him after the whole thing, I told him how well I think he did and that I think he's one of the best performers... Um, there aren't really a lot of people that I intently watched throughout the whole performance (I was looking more at the dance moves rather than the people) so I don't have much comparison. Nonetheless, I still think he danced so well that night. I was so proud of him.

 

Somehow, thinking abt that, I couldn't help but feel that God has been like that with me all this while. He doesn't compare me with other people because His eyes are always on me. I guess I understand better what it meant to be the apple of His eye. He smiles and delights when he sees that I do something and I give my best in doing it. Of course that doesn't mean he doesn't see the bad but that he will never ask me: "why can't you do that the way someone else would?" because at the end of the day, He just looks at me. And when he says he's proud of me, it's not because I've done something better than others but because I've improved and that I've given my best..

 

and what made all the difference? He looks at me because He loves me... not because I'm good or perfect... just because He loves me... =)